I’m Haiving

8/29/07 at 1:02 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments

 Our 3 y.o. girl has had some behavior problems lately, so we’ve had to deny her going out to some places.  Like most youngsters she loves going out (someplace other than home!), and she gets frustrated when denied the opportunity to travel.  Some days the first thing she’ll ask us is “Where are we going today?”  One of us will stay behind while the other takes the boys out.  When she asks why, we tell her that we can’t count on her to behave.  She then blurts out, “Mommy, I’m ‘haiving’, OK?”

There are times when her hard-headedness and screaming/yelling get very frustrating, but when she turns on the charm she is difficult to deny.  My heart feels like it gets bigger when I’m around her.  This week she is at home with Kristal while the homeschooling regimen proceeds (started Monday).  Next week she will begin at Head Start, and it looks like she’ll have plenty of structure and activities to keep her on the right path.  She has done well “haiving” the last few days during homeschool sessions.

As far as the other two boys “haiving”, we had to have the younger one’s hearing checked because it seemed like he was not hearing us when we asked him to do something.  The doctor said his hearing is fine, so we “suffer” from his selective hearing.  The older boy has had difficulties with backtalking, nothing out of the ordinary for kids to go through that phase.  He occasionally bullies the younger ones, so we have been encouraging him to act like the good older brother rather than being the source of trouble.

We expect him to step it up maturity-wise, but he still has plenty of kid left in him.  Yesterday the tiny girl was watching a “Wiggles” video, and the oldest boy joined in singing and dancing with her.  It’s great to see them enjoying things together, but it was surprising he did not dismiss it as “baby stuff”.  I suppose expecting better haiving will be a growing process.

So don’t forget – behave.  The world needs more haives.



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  1. My nearly-3-yr-old told me today that he was “being haive”. I’m correcting the poor kid all the time, for saying things like “I goed”, and I guess he was trying to forestall the correction. Paul thinks it won’t help him learn any faster to be corrected, but I think as long as he practices saying things the right way, it should make a difference. It’s not like I get harsh with him about grammar!

  2. While consistently showing him the correct way is a good goal, if you did it for every “mis-speak” you would not have time for much else! Kids will have a “transitional” vocabulary, and it’s our right as parents to enjoy the quirks that occasionally come up.

  3. That’s the truth. No doubt most of them slide by. He does seem to be picking up on certain things, though! Probably much more than we give him credit for…

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